I wonder if they're Italian.

As Ronnie, a DoZ reader named Brad and I came to know, the tucked away throwback that is MaMa DeMarinis’ is the kind of place you go when you initially  attempted to go to a different pizza place because it had a funny TV ad a few years back, you witness a drug deal outside of that (now closed) restaurant, and you drive around aimlessly until someone eventually remember it exists. That’s a story for another day… but that’s how we finally happened upon the elder most of the Bay View restaurants bearing the DeMarinis’ name last week.

Nearly dying on 27th Street after witnessing a felony aside, I’m glad for the night’s events, if only because they led us to one of the better and more unique pizzerias the Milwaukee area has to offer. Read on as I tell you why this run down neighborhood restaurant isn’t nearly as getting-AIDS-worthy as our own Sto Cazzo insists it is.
Read more »

To be honest, I never would have tried Nick-N-Willy’s Pizza if I didn’t have a friend who worked there. Prior to his employment there, I probably drove past the mini-mall pizza partition on Appleton’s Calumet Street some 50 times, never aware or caring enough to investigate who these “Nick” -N- (a cool way of writing and pronouncing the word “and”) “Willy” characters were.

“Some assholes, probably,” I’d speculate while en route to Kohl’s or some better pizza place. 

But while back in Appleton last week, I decided to pay a visit — my second in the past eight months — to both my buddy, and to Nick-N-Willy’s Pizza.
Read more »

Now 50 percent more similar.

So seldom is the world impacted by a truly great change — things like democracy, women’s suffrage, and the Slap Chop. 

More often, a minimal and altogether futile change is brought about, and no real impact is brought to our planet nor anyone residing on it. This is evidenced by an unattractive woman getting highlights put in her hair, a guy going to the gym once a month, and — most recently — Domino’s Pizza COMPLETELY RE-INVENTING ITSELF! 

Read more »

I could say Polito’s Pizza brings back memories of my college days, but I’d be lying. In fact, the UW-Oshkosh campus-adjacent pizzeria doesn’t bring back any recollections of my brash collegiate youth — the rampant public urination, the form tackling of classmates in church yards, first love, the shoddy promise of a slightly less dim future through sub-standard academia, headbutting a TouchTunes jukebox at Distillery Pub — because Polito’s didn’t open until nearly six months after I graduated.

Rather, the year-old by-the-slice hot spot brings back memories of what was probably the worst period of my life. I was working second shift (including weekends) in the one city I swore to myself I wouldn’t stay following graduation. My commute had me driving over an hour daily, and past my college dorm room and three apartments I inhabited while pursuing my Bachelor’s Degree — dreaming of more. I gained weight; I looked in the mirror every day a was embarrassed of the person I saw, which – in turn – found me inflicting irreparable damage to my (former) relationship, my friendships and my career path because I couldn’t even keep myself happy.

Still, the recent Stevens Point transplant that was Polito’s Pizza in Oshkosh was good enough to at least dull the pains of looking out at South Scott Hall through their window and thinking to myself “How did I get here?” on my lunch break. It was a palatable piece of an otherwise unsavoury experience… like Heather Graham getting naked in a movie in which she must also act.
Read more »

There’s something about a hidden treasure that totally gets my rocks off. 

In the same way that I immediately recognize that I want to do the sex to the uptight girl in glasses in most ’80s movies — even before she lets her hair down, smokes a spliff, fast dances and totally blows off finals to go to the beach! — I feel I’m able to look beyond the implied swank of a restaurant hot spot in favor of an understated and time-tested dining venue. In doing that, I find value in a place like Lisa’s Pizza, a valentine of local pizza that’s given me one of my best Milwaukee dining experiences to date.
Read more »

Like abortion, religion and Brett Favre, I’ve found Pizza Shuttle to be a rather polarizing topic. 

Since it was berthed on Milwaukee’s East Side in 1985, Shuttle has cultivated a loyal following — one cheap and overtly cheesy thick crust pizza at a time. Equally, it has garnered its fair share of hatred through over the years with its spotty service, Chuck E. Cheese for adults-type atmosphere, and hit-and-miss quality that makes the Son of Sam murders seem consistent by comparison.

Love it or hate it, if you live in or near Milwaukee, you almost certainly have an opinion of Pizza Shuttle. Here is mine.
Read more »

Though I, myself, am a Godless heathen, I feel I have a strange connection to Jewish people. I went to prom with a Jewish girl, my best friend on my college dorm floor freshman year happened to be Brew, and one of my best friends/former roommates comes from a Jewish background. 

Show me your latkes!

Moreover, I’m borderline obsessed with Stella, which is comprised entirely of Jewish comedians. I also find myself immensely attracted to Lisa Edelstein, from that lame show House. I even, sadly, own four Neil Diamond albums. All those factors paired with my prize-winning personality has resulted in me attending a Hanukkah meal or two in my time.

In honor of my Jewish friends and DoZ readers, and to gear up for another Hanukkah meal I’m to attend tonight, I thought I’d throw on my writing yamaka and schlep over to the grocery store and review Bagel Bites.
Read more »

New motto: "We used to over bleach our water."

Steny’s calls itself “A Milwaukee Phenomenon” on its Web site. Beyond the fact that it still considers itself a phenomenon after being cited for six critical health violations, there’s nothing remotely phenomenal about Steny’s.  

After Ronnie and I sampled a Steny’s slice (which he likened to “a dried fetus”) during the Iron Pizza Competition, we decided to give it a fair trial Monday… after finding out that Maria’s and The Olive Pit were both closed. Upon arriving, there was an early sign that this wouldn’t be a great experience. Not so much a feeling, a signal or an omen — a literal sign.
Read more »

We should maybe stop stealing pics eventually.

There’s an old adage that goes something like, “Use it, or lose it.” 

That statement is not only applicable to weightlifting and the male penis, but also to one’s proximity to quality late night pizza joints in the Fox Cities. When drinking on College Avenue in Appleton, Sal’s Pizza should be used.

Located in the shadow of Anduzzi’s, and directly across from Wet — that shitty night club where Nick Barnett pushed down some lady — its location leaves something to be desired. A frame of reference for those not familiar with the Fox Valley: It’s smack dab in the Appleton equal of Milwaukee’s Water Street between Juneau and Kilborn, the Madison equivalent of wherever that bar is where that wheelchair-bound little person trolls for fresh dick, the Eau Claire version of … Eau Claire. 

But despite the shitshow surrounding Sal’s, the pizza is worth stumbling the gauntlet of pavement puke, off key street performers, and Appleton Police after last call. 
Read more »

Search “Ratch and Deb’s Pizza” on Google Images and you’ll find this…

Search the East side of Oshkosh, WI for Ratch & Deb’s and you’ll find something just as fucked up and inexplicably awesome — Ratch & Deb’s deep dish pizza.
Read more »