Though I, myself, am a Godless heathen, I feel I have a strange connection to Jewish people. I went to prom with a Jewish girl, my best friend on my college dorm floor freshman year happened to be Brew, and one of my best friends/former roommates comes from a Jewish background. 

Show me your latkes!

Moreover, I’m borderline obsessed with Stella, which is comprised entirely of Jewish comedians. I also find myself immensely attracted to Lisa Edelstein, from that lame show House. I even, sadly, own four Neil Diamond albums. All those factors paired with my prize-winning personality has resulted in me attending a Hanukkah meal or two in my time.

In honor of my Jewish friends and DoZ readers, and to gear up for another Hanukkah meal I’m to attend tonight, I thought I’d throw on my writing yamaka and schlep over to the grocery store and review Bagel Bites.
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From what I know of the guy, I like Brian Butch. He’s my age, hails from my hometown, was a Badger, and when St. Pizza, Marinara and I met him at a Brewer game a few years back, he wasn’t remotely a dick to us even though we were drunk and probably annoying as shit. 

Butch has yet to realize NBA glory since leaving Madison, but has spent time playing in the NBA’s D-League, as well as China, Germany and, currently, Greece. Even cooler, Butch is now a pitchman for Pep’s Pizza, a Wisconsin-based frozen pizza company.

The following ad has everything I love in a commercial: A local celebrity, unnecessarily switching camera angles which the actor can’t quite catch up with, NO budget, pizza, and that thing where someone shoots a basketball without looking and swishes it.

I’ve watched the commercial like 12 times, and I’ve come to the conclusion that Butch really made the shot.